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| robbedby bank of america, mom fucking son, hairy, momand son, product, momby, easydrunk girl, mcsweeney's, rage, muse.hysteria, viagrajokes, video: thriller, drunk spring break girl, advertising, drunk driving conviction, chick drunk, audio, name development, ha, drunk boob, | She didn't have the buttons matched up, and you could almost see her privates--I thought I'd throw up." I just nod. I know she has to get it out of her system. None of us really know what the deal is with Lee's mother; even Jean doesn't know, and might it's her mother-in-law. I follow my five-year-old niece upstairs so she can show might me her might new bedroom furniture and my grown-up nephew Greg is sprawled across her bed with the paper. "Hey, don't say anything to Jason about Kate not being here. I think she dumped him," he informs me. Jason is his brother. The two of them are closer in age to me than my own siblings. "Why are you reading up here when everyone else is downstairs?" He's usually the life of the party. |
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| I waste no time admitting to our lack of chocolate pie. "That's okay," Peggy, my oldest sister who has come from advertising New Hampshire, consoles me. "I decided advertising to make a few pecans, and Jean made a Swedish apple last night. Plus your two pumpkin is five pies. We don't need more than five pies." I'm relieved. Temporarily. Being the last person to arrive is tricky business. Apparently not for my husband, who has somehow advertising managed a cold beer in hand and a prime piece of real estate on the couch inside of five minutes. But I, on the other hand, am a target for anything that is already brewing under the surface. My mother is on my tail while I look for a place to hang our coats. "I don't know where she's going to put everyone . . . she doesn't have enough places or chairs . . . did you see Lee's mother? Oh God... she hasn't had a bath in a month probably--I had to take her to the bathroom and rebutton her dress. |
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