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So, as my wife and her family stuffed themselves with turkey, vomited my mother-in-law's "mashed potato surprise!," got tipsy and fought over who was treated best as a kid, I hid standupny out in standupny the theater by my lonesome, having the same dinner the Peanuts standupny kids ate. The theaters were mostly empty on Thanksgiving day until about five p.m. and I had no trouble fitting in a double feature. It was me, a bunch of other loser men, single dads with their kids, and some foreigners who don't have a God damn thing to be thankful for. I paid for "Sleepy Hollow" and snuck into "Toy Story 2." If I had it to do over, I would have paid for "Toy Story 2." Actually, they're both better than average, but that Disney flick really was good shit.
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