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| mom, video: drama, teenage sex clips, 200, eggers, drunk whore, david eggers, comedian, image, maturesex, uncensored, free, stand up, israel, business, naming, open mike, drunk pantie, clips, | They would have turned many heads at the local shul -- and not because they barely legal movies weren't God's chosen. But me? My hair was too blond, my forefathers too German (we barely legal movies didn't even tell her about the kaiser), and I didn't know gefilte fish from lutefisk. I didn't want to be suckered into all the hype about in-laws and Jewish mothers. Mother-in-law. The word itself is such a stereotype, not at all nice. It's legal, clinical. Like a prenuptial agreement, it bespeaks an arrangement of necessity, not love. Besides, I thought, barely legal movies who needed such terminology. This wedding was about Andrew and me, not our families. For some time, I had been imagining our lives unfurled and intertwined with all the good stuff there, like some peopled version of a Pottery Barn catalog. |
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| For me, the books piled next to one's bed, the articles open mike cut open mike from the paper, speak legions; where or if open mike one worships says relatively little. But my world spins on a different axis than hers. So I shifted my attention to a more superficial, yet still winning, list of traits for which I might gain her approval: a balanced checkbook, respectable culinary skills, post-collegiate degrees and child-bearing hips all ranked high. Besides, I argued, it wasn't as though Andrew had been dating a long line of nice Jewish girls and then I'd come along to sully matters. His mother seemed oblivious to the fact that many of her Deadhead, old-time-musician son's recent dalliances had been saturated in patchouli oil, ensconced in beads and toting a mountain dulcimer on their way to a square dance. |
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